Brave Sir Jamie Ran Away

Jamie Rohrs is catching a lot of shit these days, but not as much as he deserves. Rohrs was in the balcony of the Aurora theater when the shooting started, with his girlfriend and their 2 kids, one an infant. I’ve already said what I think about people who were there with their kids–I don’t think much of them. But this goes double for this couple whose kids would have been far better off if both their parents had gotten their Darwin Awards that night.

Jamie Rohrs had the baby when the shots started. The baby started crying. Rohrs went, “Oh, shit, this little bastard is drawing attention my way!” So he ditched the baby and moved away. He followed up this cowardice with an act of physical bravery to save his own skin–he dropped from the balcony to the main floor near the door and beat feet out of there. Leaving his girlfriend and his 2 kids to fend for themselves. Leaving his girlfriend to locate the howling baby on her own.

How do I know this is what happened, given everything else the media got wrong? Because stupid Jamie went on CNN to be interviewed by Piers Morgan about what happened. You can watch the video on YouTube. He doesn’t admit to what I describe above. But his story is shit. He claims he ditched the baby because he thought the baby would be more likely to get hurt if he jumped with it instead of leaving it behind to be shot or trampled on the floor. He says he was thinking about his poor kids being orphans and how important it was for him to survive. Why would this idiot consent to be interviewed? Because he’s an idiot, and he thought he could get out there and spin the story before someone else ratted him out. He really thinks we’re buying his bullshit. And Piers Morgan, giant douchebag that he is, once again caught flat-footed, just let it all go by.

Other reports say Rohrs ran into the parking lot, got in his car and hightailed it out of there, afraid there were other shooters nearby. I don’t know if that’s true or not, since that’s what the media reported.

Rohrs proposed to his girlfriend in the hospital right after the shootings. She said yes. Christ, these two have reproduced two times. Dimbulb girlfriend was shepherded to safety with her kids by a 19 year old male stranger who got shot doing it, but only in the leg. He’s going to be fine.

There is, I hear, a Facebook page dedicated to trying to convince dumbass baby-momma to rescind her Yes. I understand the motivation, but I hope she goes through with the wedding. At least it will keep her from further polluting the gene pool for a little while. What we need is a website offering each of them $10,000 to get sterilized and another $10,000 if they put those poor kids up for adoption.




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